Ok so I’m trying to win Miley Cyrus tickets and meet and greets! Can you pretty please go on my instagram, @nicolepezecxo and like the collage of me licking stuff!? If you do I will follow you on instagram and love you forever!!! (P.s, a bonus would be tagging @busterradio and @wired965philly)


I don’t use condoms ;)

not because i like to practice unsafe sex but because I never have sex

(via loserslol)

Reasons why I’m better than your girlfriend

1. I have a semi-nice face
2. My butt is big, so you can touch it whenever you want to
3. I believe that I have a nice singing voice, which means that I can sing you to sleep
4. I’m awkward so you never have to worry about me trying to get with anyone else
5. I give banging ass massages
6. I’m flexible
7. Number 6 was a lie
8. I’m pro at making a sandwich
9. We can definitely drink beers together (preferably in the shower 🍺)
10. I can watch an entire tv series in like 48 hours…



the scary thing about dating is that you are either going to marry that person or break up

deep thoughts from an anus

(via hotboyproblems)

(Source: quentintortellini, via devintoughill)